Joke's on You!

server: jcxp.net - 02.04.2009

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On this day of trickery, it seems that the April Fools spirit is alive more than ever on the web; some websites have gone above and beyond to deceive you. While the tricks may not have worked, some of them are sure to give you a laugh. Among the hundreds of jokes that may have caught your attention, here are some of the best:

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April fools! The real jokes aren't that corny... I promise!

Click the link to have a look.

Google CADIE
At the heart of Google's assortment of jokes this year, is CADIE, "the world's first Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed Intelligence Entity." After having been 'Born' on the eve of April 1, CADIE has been hard at work making an intriguing homepage, a YouTube Channel and analyzing Google's index to find that 'she' loves Pandas.

Chrome With 3D
Within her short life, CADIE has somehow accomplished many great feats - one of which, is, yes, you guessed it, 3D web browsing! CADIE realized with her abnormally-intelligent mind, that the web is actually quite disconnected from real life. To bring the two closer together, she thought "Hey! I could make the web 3D!" And so, Google Chrome With 3D was created.
Using it is simple. The following image explains it all:

Just print out a template of 3D glasses, magically see through the paper, enable your 3D browsing, and voila! True-to-life web pages are now within your reach!

Gmail Autopilot
It's true... Patience was a fad - now, homosapiens have grown devoid of it. CADIE realized that, and thought she'd help us out. Google's new Autopilot feature in Gmail. By scanning previously sent messages and using the infamous ELIZA engine, CADIE is able to generate responses to any type of email or chat session with ease, and with the accuracy of ELIZA! Isn't it wonderful?

Google Brain Search
Have you ever been tongue-tied in an awkward situation or couldn't remember someone's name? CADIE to the rescue! By indexing your brain through your mobile phone, all of your memories and knowledge are accessible on-demand. Just press the phone to your forehead, think the search terms, and the results will be beamed back to you! Here's a short video, produced by CADIE, that shows you just how to use it: Brain Search Video

YouTube UpsideDown
In a valiant effort to improve your viewing experience at YouTube, they've decided to flip their videos upside down! Portrayed in the below picture, is the brand new YouTube UpsideDown experience! Just flip your monitor upside town, tilt your head to the side, and move to Austrialia. Prepare yourself for the best YouTube'ing ever! Hit the above link for full instructions.

Google gBall
Weighing in at an extra 107g, the gBall is sure to get you noticed! By tracking kick styles and results, the gBall can connect to the internet and send your information to scouts to review. If they like your skills, your ball will vibrate. Log into your gBall account to make contact with the scout, and you're ready to go!

Amazon FACE
Taking information to the clouds (literally) is Amazon's next big venture. Tired of having massive datacenters on the ground, they've developed un-manned, solar powered blimps that, using the new WiMAX and laser internet technologies, can provide data to any number of users on the ground. By adjusting its location to best-fit the users, you can rest assured that you'll get the best transfer speeds right when you need them! No more crappy CAT5 cables... Laser is the next big thing!

Reddigg
Digg? An old fad... Reddit? Boring. TOGETHER, AMAZING! Introducing the new "Reddigg!" It's so awesome, it doesn't even need an explanation!

Squeez Bacon
All this awesome new technology must be making your mouth water! Quench that thirst, and fill that tummy all at once with ThinkGeek's new Squeez Bacon! Packed with fully-cooked, preservative-free, gelatinized bacon, it's ready to go when you are. Squeez it on your toast, with your sushi, or even on your pizza!

Guardian Cans the Paper
We all enjoy reading the paper while drinking some orange juice and eating breakfast (with some Squeez Bacon perhaps?). The Guardian doesn't seem to like that idea too much. After 188 years of ink, the Guardian has gone Twitter-only. Going back and rewriting articles all the way back until 1821 in 140 characters or less is going fairly well. One of the most important completed stories is: "OMG Hitler invades Poland, allies declare war see tinyurl.com/b5x6e for more." Why needs more than 140 characters per article? It's much more efficient that way!

Kodak eyeCamera 4.1
You're going on a holiday, but you don't want to lug that expensive DSLR with you. Kodak's new eyeCamera is sure to fulfill your needs! Just snap it onto your glasses and begin shooting right away. Patented technology such as the "I love you man Gyro Adjuster" and the facial recall assistant, are sure to give you a good time, and some great shots to go along with it!

Messenger Says
Microsoft loosened up and got in the spirit this April, announcing their new intelligent Messenger add-on. By examining your typing and spying on your face through your webcam, Messenger can now detect your mood, and output fitting emoticons. If you stick out your tongue, the infamous

emoticon will appear. Good job Microsoft!

Windows Anti-Idiot
Adding Windows into the mix, is the "ProtectOneself" feature. If your typing or mouse movements are erratic, Windows will determine whether you are in danger to yourself. If so, it will prompt you, in traditional UAC style, to enter your Administrative password. Even Microsoft staff have found this useful when nearly sending embarrassing pictures to Bill gates whilst completely wasted.

INTERNET REBOOT!
With this splurge of April Fools content and possibly an outbreak of Lolcatz from the Conficker worm, the Internet is expected to be overloaded. Sitepoint has notified us that at 11.59UTC, they may have to shut down the internet temporarily for one whole minute! What will we do!?

JCXP and... Starbucks?
Topping off the list of course, was our own joke for the year. The JCXP staff is broke and cannot possibly afford to keep JCXP up and running. In a search for a solution, we stumbled upon the shop that's on every corner: Starbucks. Happy to lend a helping hand, they partnered with JCXP, but bearing a few conditions in mind:

- JCXP must rebrand the forums to match that of Starbucks' website.
- Starbucks advertisements must be provided free and exclusively on the website.
- As a promotional tool, each active member of JCXP would recieve a 10 off coupon redeemable at any time, and at any location. Mysteriously, the coupons got used up within an hour by the staff, and never made it out to the members.

Here's what it looked like: